Lovesickness as a Beloved Muse
A typical heartbreak might come with a stroll down memory lane and a dramatic playlist. Good old-fashioned chords must numb the pain, especially when everyone around is holding onto their cliches about how you'll get over it. As if they forgot how messy, brutal and notoriously painful it is to call it quits. Nobody can understand your pain like the artist who seals their feelings in a song. A couple of days ago I caught myself re-listening to ‘Drivers License’ for the third time in a row, thinking to myself: what is your problem? I’m not going through the greatest heartbreak this world has ever known, yet still drawn to those lines. Then again, I’ve developed a level of attachment to ‘Enough for You’ and ‘1 Step Forward, 3 Steps Back’ for no romantic reasons. So what is it about those gut wrenching songs that makes us play them all over again instead of choosing something more upbeat?
Why do we Love Sad Music?
It's hard to pinpoint the exact moment when songs about being madly in love turned into sad ballads. In both cases, they are successful and relatable products that exist to this day. Nevertheless, the melancholic records still tend to leave a more peerless mark. Same songs with the same old message. The theme of heartbreak should be overused by now, yet every time, there's something more to the story. Those songs are awfully somber but we all collectively find them exciting enough to play again.
Bittersweet to think that the majority of great art comes from great pain. Intrinsically, there is supposed to be some hidden ingredient that makes them so addictive. I’m eager to unravel this sonic formula that leaves me so wrecked. Is it the vulnerability and naked emotions they inject into my system? I’d argue there's something more than meets the eye. The hormones that are released in the bloodstream might be the only scientific explanation for our attraction. But I’ll try to give more tangible reasons.
Firstly, they feature lyrics that illustrate vulnerabilities that cannot be expressed in any other way. There's no sugarcoating, only truths that cut deeply and unmistakably. Songwriters are poets, and the things they do with their life stories are magical. At their core, they lean into storytelling, narrating the hardest moments of relationships. The personal approach confirms the existence of the pain you'll find yourself feeling in moments of despair.
Beyond lyrics, the emotion in the recorded voice highlights the brilliance of this genre. You can hear the break of the voice and how artists are almost reliving those moments in the studio all over again. Between whispers begging to stay and the loudness of unspoken words. They might sing as if the pain is no longer there, but the tightness in their chests suggest otherwise. To illustrate, ‘Loud’ by Olivia Dean might be the most intense track on her latest album, ‘The Art of Loving’. Recorded with an orchestra, she pours herself into every line. No doubt she possesses an incredible talent, but when artists can bring feelings to music, it just hits deeply. In an interview with ‘National Public Radio’, Dean confessed that originally there was only one take made as she “just found it to be too intense” to sing once again.
Ultimately, the ability to relate draws us in. I assume that for the most part, you are not thinking about who broke the artist's heart; you are thinking about your ex-lover. The one with guilty eyes who fed you false promises to give you the world. Naturally, we are prone to finding similarities. Memories are triggered, and one of the most complex emotions, nostalgia, finds its way to the heart. The person who once gave you butterflies then made you cry yourself to sleep; only love can be that cruel, and only music can capture that violence.
A Sense of Hopefulness and the Healing Process
Obviously, some would advise you to cheer yourself up. Nevertheless, with this sadness that lingers, the determination to put something sad on eventually wins. Bet you can't stand something sweet in this state. It might rather make you sick. Devastating verses are meant to kill you, slowly and intensely. Perhaps someone would call it masochistic to turn on something that only sinks you deeper into sorrow. Surprisingly, it's not the salt in the wound. It's a medicine that lets you release emotions that were bottled up. Music allows you to find relief and fix whatever was broken.
Feeling isolated and alone in your own misery, you become a fragile being. Heartbreak music almost normalizes the grieving experience and brings a sense of support when it seems like no one bothers to understand the depth of your grief. Lyricism based upon the angst of love is a universal language anyone can resonate with. A musician has the power to capture the ache and regret that comes with experiencing loss. They freeze wistful and raw emotions, immortalizing them in verse and chorus. You don't have to make sense of your pain; someone has already put that emotional madness into graceful poems. When the wound is still fresh, the emotions are more vivid and only music can be on a par with its intensity. The bond between heartbreak music and the listener is unbreakable and irreplaceable, woven from the pain of a once-happy love affair. Sad songs help us to decipher the complexity of the events and feelings we end up with. It is a healthy way to heal, when bad habits and tears can no longer ease the pain.
In all likelihood, after an emotional rollercoaster, you need some light to soothe the heartache. After darkness, the search for light takes place. Hope is a powerful force and a vital feeling to embody. You thought you would never make it but abruptly you feel like you might. It's good to move on this way. When words of well-meaning people don't reach you easily, perhaps music will get through those walls and show you that life goes on and love is all around. It takes time to heal and acquire the ability to cope with the inner struggles. Sooner or later, you will no longer even think of the distress that once consumed you due to a broken heart.
“Somebody loved me once (loved me once). And someday, somebody will again”
What Accounts for its Success?
Beautifully crafted, they still stand out on their own. Over the years, the emotions they contain or provoke remain just as intense. You cannot resist this subgenre, even if you aren’t going through heartbreak or moving through a dark chapter. Even being in a happy relationship won’t stop you. There is a certain irony to this phenomenon for me, someone who takes great pleasure in heartbreak anthems but would never let anyone have this power over me. I act unbothered, yet I still return to this genre every now and then. You should witness what is happening in my head while listening to Miss Olivia Dean or the proclaimed queen of sadness, Lana Del Rey. It demands a certain level of self-knowledge and bravery to create something so purely exposing. No wonder it's so successful and will not leave the charts. There’s a comfort to these familiar sounds. Eventually, wounds are healed and you still enjoy the sadness of the previous playlist. The world's interest in the same old beat is enthralling to me. It seems like these melodies are timeless and deeply embedded in us.
Speaking of heartbreak albums, ‘You Seem Pretty Sad for a Girl So in Love’ by Olivia Rodrigo is quite the instance of a love story filled with personal fears. After a few upbeat songs, she exposes her struggles, and we learn how she drew apart within her last relationship. Rodrigo’s third album is a sensitive and touching tale that moves from the joyful ‘Drop Dead’ to the extremely raw and vulnerable ‘The Cure’. The bittersweet record has found its place in millions of hearts (mine included).
“And I could try convincing you they’re just intrusive thoughts. But you’ve seen me truly happy, so you know right now I’m not”
Olivia Rodrigo by Chad Moore via Geffen Records
It's easy to get caught up in a hurricane of emotions. By nature, like any other hardship, it's tough to overcome heartbreak by yourself. Seemingly, the responsibility to not let you drown, falls on music. If you can't do it alone, leave those loving lies behind and put your headphones on. Music won't shut you out or turn into a traitor. It won’t play twisted games, and will never leave you in silence. Nothing may soothe our hurting hearts this much. Even if you are alone, enjoy it and be as dramatic as you want. If you’re not feeling like your world just ended because some guy didn't text you back, it sounds like wasted youth to me.
Indeed, music certainly makes you rethink your outlook on love and relationships. Really, it's a beautiful concept to put your experiences and stolen moments into ballads that anyone can hear. If you ever hit some kind of a creative block, try to get your heart broken, because who knows what road it will lead you down. Mourning will fuel your creativity, and that emotional rollercoaster can cause an artistic outburst that becomes a breathtaking creation.
When you are lovesick and no doctor can help, the only antidote must be a good album. The heartbreak theme is here to stay, and now I hope you don't wonder why.
Olivia Rodrigo